Grey by EL James
Read on: kindle app
Date Read: 6/18/15-6/23/15
Playlist: The Fifty Shades of Grey movie soundtrack. It’s actually kinda perfect.
Set up: Because you obviously haven’t had enough of Fifty Shades yet. I mean, three books and a movie are just NOT enough. [I’m being sarcastic here, but not really, but mostly].
Ok, so this is the book you go into like… Wait? Am I reading this?… Wait? Why am I reading this?… Wait? Why isn’t this that terrible????
So real talk… Have you read Fifty Shades of Grey after the original hype died down? Because I have and let me tell you, it is NOT good. You read Fifty Shades the first time thinking this is the “cool” new read, and for the most part it is. It’s hot, it’s dirty, it’s different, it’s intense and you’re hooked right away. But after all the hype dies down and you settle into reading this book as just another book, well, it just leaves a lot to be desired.
If you’re like me, you decided it would be a good idea to re-read the series before the movie came out. That was my first mistake. The book at a second read is awkward and fumbling. I mean, I guess that’s the idea, because Ana is awkward, but really? I don’t need to know so much about her inner goddess and her feelings. I only made it halfway through the second book the second time around…. Then, you decide to go to the movie, at the movie theater, because, you must of course. That was mistake number two. The movie is so awkward that I times I found myself cringing and turning my face away. Some of the things that happen in the movie are too awkward and ridiculous to watch with a straight face. [Please note the number of times I say awkward in this paragraph, because there is absolutely no way to describe Ana other than awkward].
But ok, after all this, back to the subject at hand: Grey. When I first heard about Grey, I was like, is this really necessary? Do we really need to relive this story from his point of view? But of course, being me, I was definitely going to read it. I thrive on torture obviously.
Review: The most shocking part is when I was about 20% into the book and decided I was 100% not hating it. This might have something to do with the fact that I didn’t have to hear all of the inner workings of Ana’s head this time around. Christian ends up being a pleasant surprise.
Christian is dark and serious, but from the second he meets Ana he starts to get confused by everything he does. He’s doing things he never thought he’d do, he’s saying things he never thought he’d say, and while originally he just wants her to be his new submissive, he starts to realize he NEEDS her any way he can have her. Nothing he does or says or feels is a reaction that he’s used to and he isn’t always sure how to handle it.
Clear, embarrassed eyes meet mine and halt me in my tracks. They are the most extraordinary color, powder blue, and guileless, and for one awful moment, I think she can see right through me and I’m left… exposed.
He’s not used to having this many feelings and doesn’t always know what they mean. He finds himself drawn to Ana and unable to fully focus on anything else. He kind of starts slacking on work (which for him, basically means he works A LOT, as opposed to ALL THE TIME).
I want her.
All of her.
Her body and soul.
He’s not used to wanting MORE and is often unsure how to proceed around her, how to behave as a normal person in a normal relationship would.
He’s consumed by thoughts of her but still wants her to fully submit to him. He doesn’t know how to balance both because he’s never had to before. He’s always gotten exactly what he wanted out of relationships and this young, innocent girl keeps pushing all his boundaries. He’s never felt remotely inclined to put himself in this position. He can’t let go of the idea of what he thinks he needs. He can’t fathom compromise and definitely is not willing to let go of his needs. But then you start to see him try. Everything is unknown to him but he tries. At times he comes off as vulnerable and confused, which gives him a bit more humanity than Fifty Shades does.
He’s anxious and insecure about what Ana will say to him, you see him reading everything into her facial expressions or whether she signs her name with an x or not. Through this book, I start to find Christian adorable, which is not something I thought I’d ever think of him.
- He’s so unconcerned about his looks. Actually, more like burdened by it almost. Every time someone is gaping at him at first sight, he always thinks, “It’s just a pretty face”. He doesn’t want people to focus on his beauty because he doesn’t feel that on the inside.
- 25%- Though it’s no good for wax play… At least he’s always focused on his end goals.
- 35%- I have managed to keep Anastasia Steele out of every waking thought today. Almost. How he struggles to keep her out of his thoughts even though he’s busy enough to put anything out of his mind.
- 85%- My kiss is back. Well, that’s a relief. He craves that little x after Ana’s name in her emails.
- 96%- I’ve come for Team USA. I mean… I mean, is that even a real expression? What does that even mean? Of course I know what it means, but why??
I wake, with a start.
Today, I win her back.
Overall, I gave this book 3.5 stars. Grey took me way longer than I thought it would to read. I thought I’d just sit down and devour it, but found myself needing time away from Christian and all his anxiety. However, I was pleasantly surprised by the inner workings of Christian Grey’s mind.